Hellos. I was suppose to go out today! But.., my parents simply dun allow. D:forget abt it.! And I was so so so furious now, lik a volcano , that could exploits at anytime!
Time to hear all my rantings now!

Firstly, my parents, no, rather my mum, she doesn't gv mi any freedom.! Nt in de way tht she ask mi to keep study, bt in fact she persuade me nt to study. :0 bt still, she doesn't allow me to go out, to whoever or anywhere. She doesn't allow me to go out wif ppl, beside elsie,szemin. So so, my outings will ALWAYS be wif them.
Secondly, she doesn't even allow me to hang out with primary school mates and ya, don't even need to say someone who she never sees before! She doesn't allow me to go to any of de programs or outings with a large group where she say have a lot pai kias, bt de fact tht was , there was none and u wun knw unless u try it right?.
Thirdly , I could simply lie to her that I was gg out wif elsie and szemin and she simplys wouldn't suspect cos Imma gd girl.. But still I didn't, cause lik I said, I was simply an obedient, good girl (:
But still she didn't took all these of my “good” into considerations, she think that I SHOULD OR OUGHT TO BE so guai, and when I told her this, that actually I am very good girl, she says, “carry on to lie, if u like! And If u really does that, it just simply shown that I had failed in my upbringing of u and I’m just a total failure”. Worse still, she didn't praise me and continue her lecture and naggings. ! bt de fact that was I didn't evn lie! And still, She talks a lot crap and thinks that its naturally of me to be so "GOOD" -,-‘’
Its total bullshit. Ya, maybe without her strictly discipline and restrictions , I may gone astray long ago, or become a total ahlian already. But still me, myself., play a BIG part in it too,. Without my own self- discipline and good nature, behavior , I would had lied to them long ago and maybe, I will become an ahlian alrd.
But still, even if I go out with elsie, she only restricts me to that few places. When I say go marina or whatsoever, she will like say, “huh, go so far! “ bla blab la. Which means I cant go, and only go to that few places which she stated as “NEAR”, despite the fact that Singapore is already so small. ! And what comes worse, was that , she said that I’m naggy, when she’s the one who is so super nagging..! Still remember once when I was lik going an outing with someone, big group. And she ask” u sure u know all of them? What bla bla rubbish.!! Later all pai kias there, and u get bad influence how! This is de part when all people started to turned rebellion due to peer pressure, and destroyed their own future , bla bla , La la la. Nagging starts. !”
But still, she was nt totally wrong, it does makes sense, but ya, I don't know. People had great friends out of schools, was because through all these outings , gatherings, etc. but me.? U wont get know of new friends if u don't start mixing around, and being forced staying at home eeryday right! People had friends outside was mostly , through friends , friend, etc. I still remember once asking her if I could attend a gathering and she was like, ==== then I tell her, then she said” go lor, go ahead! If anything happens to you, I wont take any responsibility ! “ -,-‘’
If change to others, people sure attitude already, but I didn't , I was lik respect her, and her decision. -,- and i dn really attend ite. alrights I’m speechless now cause I think I was just simply a too over ‘good” girl. ! even person A(some1 I know very long), her mum was so protecting her too, but she allows her to mix with friends’ friends. Like ya, whatever,. People also have cousins, for me, have is like dun have, due to some conflicts and arguments they have before even I was born to this world. So, I’m already pitiful enough, somemore she still restrict this and that.
What worst was that she still complained that I’m not good enough, why don't she look at the positive side ? Still rembember sec1 or 2, she complained that I’ve changed, and keep going out, when the fact that was I only go out thrice for a holiday, which is like peanuts to others.she also take comparisons with my brother, ya, how obedient was myy bro, and I was having “pan ni” period.! Ya ya , whatever. Now thinking back, im already too guai already. Maybe she was protecting me, but still, idk lah. The more I say now, the more emotional I becomes already! What the fish. Even I say “sibei” at home, I kena a good lecture. ! -,-‘’ “who teach u so chu de hua?” and started questioning... and added, “you really changed, what dabian!”Please, if I say a word, cb, or fuck , I cant imagine de consequences. == and still my dad was better than mum. He allows me to go out, not like my mum. When is like I tell her last week that this week I’m going out. Then day before .”im going out tomorrow.” Then at night, if I didn't mention anything, she will say” don't need to remind me already hor! Also never inform ur dad!” mum to dad” you knw hor, ni de nu er hor, ming tian yao qu sentosa leyy! Hai qu dao jiang yuan“ and in a super scarastic tone.!Ohno. I have to stop this topic now before my blood vessels explodes.

Alrights, I’m really into TVB /hongkong now! :D I have oso get to know a lot ppl who likes TVB shows. KEKEKE(: and ddsy was a reali gd friend(: LK oso, he even gives mi his acc to download videos. :D NICE BUNCH OF PEOPLE! Kristen,xiaolin,vy,leeyan,aimei,wslee,wk,sherelle,im,xiru,pearlyn,and many more were TVB fantatic too. (: get to knw them recently. I was reali into NR. Trust me. I LOVE YHHQ. Enticing. :D Intriguation! but still, I hate de part of qingqingyangyang. SPOILER of de show! Still gets award. -,- YHHQ&JHYY is de 2 shows that I’m most enthu and intrigue to in my this entire life. Esp yhhq. Oh gosh.! :DDD And I’m reali very enthu to it this time, I can actually took my 3 hours time to search fr 1 magazine ,which contains stuffs abt yhhq inside it. and read newspaper everyday, just hoping that i get to read de news that are related to it. Okay, first time in my life ever I’m so crazy. But nt oni me, and others also, and is them who like makes mi more enticed, more crazy. :DD stalk this shows everyday and all those entertainment news/interviews etc. I everyday go stalk okay! :D respect my own craziness. And enthuasim! Download a lot videos and episodes about it too. (: my phone is totally full of all de pictures and videos! <33

Watch a video of mi when I was 3 years old ytd, a lot of memories came back and I have a lot of sudden undescrible feelings): How I wish time would rewind, I was like whoa, slim like hell alright.1 word, boneyy!!it’s really skinny, even skinner than bamboo.. and all those funny ideas came in my mind. :x I was lik having de thoughts of re-taking secTWOs. Tell mama about it and she treated me like insane. But still if I go back sec2 , I would be so relax, stress-free n a total genius. :D Ok, no more daydreamings. My parents is not going to allow it.and I also thought of, like. tell my parents that I want a migration to hongkong,Taiwan or Malaysia. Their education there were like so stress free and well, I wd be happier. But still, all these are oni my own stupid imaginations.just as I was about to think of more funny and unrealistic ideas, this cruetly world had pull me back to reality. No more daydreams. No more fairytales. :<

I have sort through. Tell others my sort through worries n they all say “DIE LIAO! THIS TYPE OF THINKING!!” ok. I have sort through tht its ok nt to study, cause if im nt going to enjoy myself now, life would be meaningless. Dun care so much and live happily matters most, (: it sounds logical, right! Well, I knw its nt very “healthy” to have this type of thinking , bt still ==. 2010 is coming to an end, and 2011 is starting in a week time. ): everything is coming to an end. My chemistry,SS,physics ALL UNDONE! Great! ):, worryyyyyyy. ): but worrying isn’t going to help at all. So don't waste time to worry! (: and rather use de time to do(: but still my English was still lousy than ever. Cant even properly expressed myself ): ROFL. Off to eat now.Hungry. and ya, last thing. I gained a dunno how many damn weights during this holiday, and espically it’s Christmas! Eating more! :<